still a raya mood, no?

Was across the border the wholeeee Saturday because of.....raya visit cum kak yana's engagement ceremony.
Hehehe shes so pretty :)
Not to mention 2 of the waiters from the catering service is mega cute but the downfall is that they....are not singaporeans. Lol.

Okay saya sedang letih, so pictures on Saturday only okayyyyy. will update a proper one about raya after raya is over :)

Byeeeee.








HOW CUTEZZZZ IS THE BABY!? OMGGGGGG! (referring to the picture above)



Hopefully tomorrow's outing will be awesome :) kachingggggg!

I can't wait to enroll to dance class!
Hehehehehe!
'm sooooo happy right now.
&'ve been a red blooded woman for 5 days now(?) i think.
That could probably explains my sadthenhappythendistraughtthenexcited post like now(!!!!)

&why's my device arriving so late!?
I want it nowwwwwwww ):

Right now 'm wondering whether my attachment pay is in my account already or not. Right now 'm wondering what D is up to. Right now 'm wondering is there any food in the kitchen. Right now 'm wondering how am I going to spend my holidays wisely. Right now 'm wondering whether Monday's outing will be awesome or not(but D's day is on that day also! :S). Right now 'm wondering if I am ever going to go out of the house to jalan raya w my family(or either w mum/dad). Right now I am hungry.

I think i should study, shouldn't i? Mmmmm let me get something to eat first, then we'll talk about study. Hehehe.

byeeeeeeez.

not what you expected.

I can't say 'm leading the life that I want right now, but 'm sure as time pass by, 'll get used to the fact that my family is going to be physically broken soon. Only a few knew about the situation but after they read this, 'm sure many will know about it and probably ask one another about this. So to cut it short, just ask me. 'm not rich or pampered or fortunate or such a brat like what people said. I actually had to fight for what I want. Or at least show some effort that I did try(probably than I might get what I want and that also depends on whether 'll comply to the rules). I am neither happy nor sad. I am just neutral. Most of the time if you see me smiling or laughing, it'll be for that moment of time(or incident) only. Then 'll back to the same old routine. 've tried my best to change their decisions but if they do not want to, 've to respect their decisions being whether it'll hurt me or not. Now isn't that frustrating? Don't get me wrong, I love my dad& mum. But sometimes, their egos will overtake them and they'll start thinking for themselves and not the children. Both starts to plan their futures w/o each other and how are they going to cope w changes involving themselves& only the children(w/o their so called wife/spouse anymore). 'm not too sure myself if 'm fine right now. But i will be, maybe. Till then, 've not idea how long can I be 'myself'.

As you know about D, I never regretted getting to know D few years back. I hesitated for a while probably because he's quite older than me& we had this weird connection between friends(that when we found out about it recently, we realized that we were physically near yet mentally/psychologically far). We contacted for a while or so, then stop contacting each other. Till he saw me again, then he started contacting me again and that was a year ago. That's when we frequently talk on the phone, texts each other and D looks out for me(our v first inside story). I ignored the fact that I hated giving my number to strangers just like that. But he was a different case. He knew my people and I kinda knew his. I remember meeting him for the v first time. He thought I was wearing a police tee when an actual fact is that i wasn't. Now that I thought about it, I realized what a catch line to start a conversation. It was cute tho. After that less than 20 mins meeting w each other since he just walked me home from the bus stop, he texted me that it wasn't going to be the last time. True enough, it was just the beginning. We started meeting frequently. He is a good listener, friend, kind of weird, mysterious but too nice at times. I love being w him, just talking walking sitting doodling studying joking insulting storytelling and whatnot. Frankly, I didn't expect anything between us to go beyond friends. I even fought w a friend last year because of this. But eventually I was expecting for it to happen...till now. I tried to make friends w the other opposite sexes. But I tend to exclude myself from their life after texting or talking on the phone w them just after the first time. Reason why? idk. But 'll find out from myself soon. No matter what, D still has his tiny portion in my heart.

Choosing the right friends is important in life. That is why no matter how temperamental/ego/hypocrite/gossipers they are, only four people meant the most to me. I don't have to type it here but you should have guessed it. Especially one of them whose been there for me since I was only 11. We have many different personalities, dress codes, attitudes and life but if we put the flaws aside, I realised that these are actually the only people I need in my life to support my back when 'm going to crash and fall. No, they're not my bff or what shit these kids calls these days. They are just friends to me who are placed in their own tiny portion in my heart. Besides these four, I still appreciate the presence of the rest of my friends. They meant to much to me that when they're around, 'll just be happy because 'll get to not remember about my life instead enjoy being w them.

All these are just the third things i need in my life. I need to find my own physiological& safety needs first. Yes, i believe in the hierarchy.

Have a ride of my wild life if i must say.
Would you?

how'd you like my pink kebaya? :)

edit//

I am in the Big Bang's music mode right now. Hehehehe.
I need to enroll myself in a dance class soon!
:)

How's my raya so far? Eve of Eid& First day is always the best, the rest of the days?
Nope, not as much.
Now that vacations is starting to kick in,
shop/raya outings/dates = awesome.

oh and somebody is spotted w a new sidebangs! :}
it was hard departing w my fringe but had to. :}

xo.

You were too angst.

random rambling.

VMAs! :)
byeeeeeeeee.

sense of humour

I kept watching this video for over 10 times already and yet, i can't seem to stop laughing.
Not being racist btw, it's meant to be like that.
:)
Stef& Dha, this is for you :)


Thanks to Nab for accompanying me just now.
I think I've become a red blooded woman today(?).
Major cleaning to be done tonight.

I've been reflecting and everything's in the drafts. Will update about it i think.
Till next time.

CR week is great for a start.
For our new 1.2, we'll study a new topic and instead of biological science, we'll be taking up behavioral science. I kinda like it.
It's like drama class but very scientific& also interesting.
Probably a good topic for a person who is unsure of themselves, for example, me. Very very contradicting girl or is it egoistic? Hopefully 'll find out soon after 've read up more on Maslow's Hierarchy.

Anw, 'm actually glad that we have CR week tho it's like a week before the festive season and it's v redundant, i had fun catching up w the crazy(not theoretically) girls, the different clique girls& i kinda....miss some of the boys. So yes, I love it up till now despite having to bath after sahur straight away and take the early crowded train.

After school today, Ibu picked me up from school and we headed off to Geylang(for the first time this year) w me still in my uniform. Idah&Fiqa even said to me just now, ni baru punk rock. Haha!
Got my outfit finally, was v sleepy so i waited for her in the car while she bought food for break fast later at home. Reached home just in time for buka.

My "bible" is giving me unnecessary aches at my hands.
I need to get a new bag asap.
I need to get a new handbag? Should i? 've got too much already but.....nevermind.
I need to get a new pair of heels because mine is officially broken.
Okayyyyyyyyyyy I can't wait for Friday!
bye.

It got you too curious because you were thinking too much about?
Me.
:)

just admit it.

I love her pop/blues/jazz sound.
Wish she had curled her hair, would be more better.
I love how successful she is now.
:)

"missy!" "nurul!" nurse nurse!" :)

"I still believe my heart.
I could still feel it double pedaling even though 've left it w you.
Hehehehe~
:)"

I finished my 1.1 w a bang. I loved every minute of it.
&if you don't, might as well quit if you think it's a burden.
Don't piss me off w your whining.
bye.

all mixed up

I ammmmm so hungry right now but I don't want to eat anything.
My appetite's gone downnnnnn.
&later 'm on afternoon shift again.
Haiyooooo I don't care. I want my Friday to be a morning shift, I need my rest!!!!!


&&&hey love, 2 more weeks :)
i loveeeee surprises! <3



he's not who you think he is. sorry if I hadn't tell all of you.

out of here.

One more week till the festive season.
I have not even stepped into gayland(i meant geylang), this year.
I have not even searched for my festive season's clothing.
I am looking forward to morninggggg shift on thurs&friday!
Just as I was getting along w all the staffs in central, we are coming to our last week of attachment.
well, that's life.
bye.


please stop crying at those fictional stories. please be strong nurul.
;terlalu banyak dugaan sekarang. tolong jangan tambah masalah please.

my muse.

(1) Less than 24 hours<3
(2) Less than 24 days more<3
(3) Less than 24 minutes ago<3

Oh how i loveeeeeee 24 :)
&24 divided by 2 is 12.
Soooo what makes me love it more is that 12 is my fahvurret number :)


Okay I am happy today because I finished 22 skills which qualifies me to pass my clinical posting.
Hehehe, i will try and get my book back from the lecturer for other skills to be signed but yes, no more worries :)


I am strong enough to face this obstacle and I've open up enough details to talk about my private life before you.
I've learned that ego plays a big part in any r/s& being big-headed doesn't even help.
So if you think you want to leave, leave and don't say "we'll meet again" or "keep in touch" b/c it hurts too much for me to think about it or you anymore.
Sorry is cliche.
If it's goodbye, then IT IS goodbye.

S-"Till we meet again." (hands out hand for a shake)
C-"Just go." (walks away)
C- (in his mind)If i were to hold your hands, I won't be able to let go. So please just leave.
S-"Stupid boy." (runs to C and hugs him)

That's our story.

this is the stupid way of blogging kids.

this picture sibeh act cute.
i is so damn bored d d d d d d d.
today is an off day for attachments kids because it was teacher's day yesterday
&i didn't go back to yc! ): because i was on afternoon shift.
so yesterday wasn't that bad, did a lot but it was not boring. he he he, the patients so cute.

okehhhhh, two more weeks and attachment is overrrrr then go back to school for a week headstart and then wharrrrrt? Raya + vacation la!
but i don't think i'm that excited especially w the inside situation being so so so havoc.

go watch syurga cinta okeh readers, awesome storyline.
i is not a fan of all this malay merepek talking movies but this is awesome.
touching really(i cried)! he he he.

i cannot wait to meet d d d d d d d d(l).
byeeeeeezzzzzzzz~

(note: i promised myself i won't type like this again. lol.)

aku dan dia

I miss sneaking out. I miss hanging out. I miss playing stupid/childish games. I miss betting stupid things. I miss storytelling. I miss laughing. I miss teasing. I miss the awkward moments. I miss the breeze. I miss the quiet cricket moments. I miss sighing. I miss judging. I miss staring. I miss thinking. I miss being scared. I miss being cold. I miss being a rebel. In short, I miss kamu. Be glad that I am mentioning you right now! :)
note: (no, it's not about the boy in the picture. hahahaha. but still, to be fair, i miss that boy in the picture also. :D)

Hopefully, next weekend's plan w E-crew will be confirmed, super excited for it :)

Freshies students are coming to the ward next week, excited for it also so I can bully them. Hahahaha, no la, obviously I'm happy because I've finished most of my skills so I can let them do if they want to.

Went to Bugis w Joyce, Ria& Ridhwan on Tuesday after morning shift to get our nursing watch. Then did some accessories shopping which was fun and break fast at Tong Seng, and headed back home happily because I love love love me bangles :)

Will be doing replacement tomorrow& hopefully my stomach& head don't make any problems since I was having a bad headache& stomachache. Ugh.

Us is still alive.

Before you all start judging or whatever, we are fine.
We are still us.
:)

This lyrics is just awesome;

Listen...

Can't count on you most of all when I really need it
It's the simple things that you do, really hurt my feelings
The more I try, the more I'm starting to see it
This can't work anymore, than you believe it

Goodbye may come as a shock
Even though I love you a lot
I've given every breath I've got
Sometimes you just gotta break down and breathe

And how many times I gave my heart
To how many times we fell apart
And it equals
A promise in the dark
So don't promise me

And how many times I gave you me
Divided by so many memories
And it equals
A promise in the dark
So don't promise me

Listen...

I just don't know what the problem is, what the deal is
Was I there too much, did I move too fast, I couldn't see it?
All these promises are probably how you deal with it
I'm tired of hearing you say your innocent

Don't think I forgot
Because I really didn't care if you're lying a lot
I've given every breath I've got
Sometimes you gotta break down and breathe

And how many times I gave my heart
To how many times we fell apart
And it equals
A promise in the dark
So don't promise me

And how many times I gave you me
Divided by so many memories
And it equals
A promise in the dark
So don't promise me

We all make mistakes
Sometimes we do desperate things
What does it prove? NOTHING
And you never do nothing wrong

Then what took you so long, took you so long
Cuz I keep, keep hanging on, keep, keep hanging on

And how many times I gave my heart
To how many times we fell apart
And it equals
A promise in the dark
So don't promise me

And how many times I gave you me
Divided by so many memories
And it equals
A promise in the dark
So don't promise me

So don't promise me
So don't promise me.

hello today.

A month and few days more..♥
Should I call the helpline now?
Or did I just ran out of it?

Let me tell you alllllllll something okay,
you want something, you fight for it.
Don't be a pussy& wait for it.
:)


Btw, I suke jacket ni. Nice right? ;)

&thus, begins my hiatus.
Bye now.

If it's true love, then it will be back.

I am having a runny nose& sore throat right ):
Tgif, but tomorrow I still have to replace for my sick leave. Haiyyooooooooooo.
Oh, get well soon Ridhwan Selenge who contracted hsatunsatu(unbelievable but true) and now thanks eh for making me worry for myself since I'm always w you after our shift! &I'm having the symptoms already.

Sidetrack;
//
National day w this people was awesome. (see picture above& spot someone who is v the semangat to wear red& white top to bottom :P)
Instead of watching fireworks like I thought we would, we ended up going to random places decided at that point of time.
Got home at 3am& hit the sack right away.
:)

//
Meeting w Dd was great also(L)!
He looks cute as always just like my text ringtone.

//
I've got to go now, me nose is killing me! zzzzzzz.

//
You are still special to me.
But if we're meant to be,
we'll meet again.
Instead of me working hard on it, you'll do it next time.
If we're not meant to be,
hopefully you'll be happy in the future w your life
&we'll be friends w benefits still.
:)

xo.

No more tricks.
It's wrong and almost...forbidden i think,
but that kept me going for almost a year now.
Can I deal w it again?
Probably tonight I'll find out.
Bye.