Big girls don't cry.

It hurts real bad. I don't know why emotionally depressed. Yes, surprisingly. If not, why the hell am i crying silently in class? I need to be independent, don't i? I totally broke down real bad when i saw something which i shouldn't have seen or i must not see. I have to go one alone for real. Mum saw the report card and she was very, and shall i say too dissapointed? I know that i sucked for real and you shouldn't have depend on me. I am not dumb, i know that. I am just mentally slow. I get that. But i can't get the fact that to you, comparing me with others, will get me better results. Have you actually support me with what i want to do in life? No, you don't. I wasn't in the mood after an incident or shall i say, a for real dumb drama happened today. Went home straight from school. As i was walking home, i was thinking that maybe if i'm independent and pretended that i'm invisible in school, i'll do well. Maybe i was wrong. Or is it too early to tell? Maybe so. School isn't fun anymore when things that are not supposed to happen actually happen. Now, i can't confide to anyone at all anymore. It seems like all the trusts fade away real quick. I am having doubts right now. I lost everything i ever had. I am now regreting everything that i ever did in the past. I know the past is the past and that i shouldn't rake up the past. It isn't fun nor happy anymore. It is a really depressed situation. Friends come and go. Family? They think they know you, but really, for a real fact, they don't. Girlfriends stay as one. Boyfriends may not last. But i am still doubting the fact that girlfriends don't actually stay as one. They could also break up; Dunzo.

I shall not be sad anymore right? Might as well i put on a fake smile everywhere. Ain't that great? Exams are really around the corner and i need to buck up real quick and cheer up soon. Thank the Lord, Friday's here already. I really need the weekends to get my rest. Family will be off to Johore on Sunday to collect our Hari Raya's clothing. Something tells me that it isn't going to be a fun year during Hari Raya. But luckily, our EOY finished days before Raya. And that cheers me up abit. And might i say that i really want to be promoted to Secondary Four. It ain't easy as what you people think. Neither what i thought it would be. I am having this feeling that every living souls around me, and i'm pressing on the word, every, that they are either going against me or just being a pain in the bottom. Anywhoos, another 41 more minutes to breaking my fast. I have to go and get my cold shower. Don't bother tagging at all.

And for the fun of it,

Pink Monstaa Stupid Face.

I have another version of this picture but in yellow(: